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Mug Root Beer "Fetch Mug.
Get a Stick."

Role: Copywriter​​

Brief: When you buy Mug Root Beer, their mascot, Dog, will send you a stick from his precious collection. (Yes, sticks. We actually shipped sticks to people.)

He loves each stick so much, he wants to write a note about each one — but he needs some help due to a marked lack of opposable thumbs.

We were asked to write 1000+ unique lines about sticks in Dog's tone of voice. 

A few of my lines.​​

​

  • I dug rly deep for dis stik. I tink I fownd da old familee hamztur, too. *Personal fave.

  • Dis stik iz onlee 98% cumplet… I ate lyke 2% ov da bark… itz stil a gud stik doh. Enjoi.

  • U got de wurst stik of dem all. April fulz. BTW, wat is “april”? 

  • AHHHHHHHHH! Dat is how I felt wen I saw dis stik fur da very furst tyme.   

  • Footure arkiologists will see dis stik and wondur...waz dis a tool fur wursheeping gawds? No. It iz fur byting.   

  • If u skwint rly rly hard at dis stik, lyke rly hard, u can see da color blak.   

  • This wondrous stick must be magical, I can finally spell correctly! My brain synapses are fyreing so phast – o noe...itz waring awf... *Personal fave.

  • I did nawt meen to sine awaye my rites to dis stik wen I shook da hooman’s paw, but heer we r. U will heer frum my lawyur.   

  • Nobodeez purfekt. But dis stik is nawt a persun, so it iz purfekt.   

  • Dis stik had so manny bugz on it. Don’t wury, I ate dem all fur da proteen.   

  • If u stik dis stik in da grownd, it standz up. Dat is bcuz stiks wil awlwayz stik up fur u.   

  • My teef gawt a guud flawssing from dis stik. Itz vary gud for gingivitiz. 

  • If reeinkarnashion iz reel, I will com bak as dis stik. So plz giv it pets.  

  • Dis is da worldz bezt bak scracher stik. Jus put it on gras and role arownd. Mmmm. *I found this one on Ebay! 

  • How mutch wud wud a wud chuk chuk if a wud chuk cud chuk wud? I dunno, but u can chuk diz stik purty far.   

  • Sum of dis stik is insyde my stuhmak. Now, we wil alwaze b kuhnekted.   

  • Bcuz dis iz an emoshionul suhport stik, ur lanlord canut leegully make u paye pet rint fur it. *Personal fave. 

  • If u shayk dis stik arownd rly hard, u can feel ur brayn knok agenst ur skull. Trye it. 

  • Stiks lyke these don’t gro on treez. Rite? 

  • Dis stik can breeng wurld peas if u brake it intwo...lyke...a lawt ov leetle peeces.  

  • Dis stik is a leetle lumpee, but dats okay. It iz a bahdy pawsitivitee stik.   

  • Sumtymez i pondur wat wurld wundurs dis stik saw on itz jurney to u...hopfuly tenis bawls.   

  • If u put dis stik in da sun it will git warme. Majik.  *Personal fave.

  • Arnt we all dis stik deepe downe? It may nawt look speshul at furst, but it iz won ov a kynd.   

  • Wen lyfe givs u lemmonz. U shuld poke dem wit dis stik. 

  • If u git sad? Stik. Hongry? Stik. Happi? Stik. Dis iz a multyporpuse stik. 

  • Dis is da best stik of dem all. Donut tel de other stiks, dey have jellousy ishues.   

  • Mlem mlem mlem. Dats wat it sownds lyke wen u lick dis stik.   

  • U kan yoose dis stik to duel da mailman. Mak shure he has a stik, too – to mak it fare, yanno.  

  • I fownd dis stik at nite. So far, it haz nawt becum werestik, but b kareful of ful moonez. *Personal fave.

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